*Cue Mariah Carey*

It's tiiiiiiiiiiime!

Listen, holiday movies may not be your thing and I won't call you a Grinch. I know a lot of people struggle with this time of year, so there's a little bit of grace to be given. I too am not a huge holiday person, but one thing about it is that I love to watch holiday movies and shows. You should trust my judgement because as the title suggests, I don't like corny things. And if I do it's ironic. So grab some hot cocoa or pour up a glass of Bailey's or red wine and give some of these a chance if you've never seen them!

P.S. To my fellow holiday movie lovers, let me know if I'm missing any of your favorites and what other ones I should watch. (I can't get into anything made before the mid 80s-90s besides Charlie Brown of course --- sorry not sorry 😄)

Home Alone

20th Century Studios Family

This is a classic that really needs no summary but in short, Kevin's family treats him like shit. He's got loads of siblings and they bully him because he's one of the younger kids. They go on Christmas vacation and forget him. He then has to make boobie traps to fight off two burglars. This happens again in Home Alone 2 but in New York City. This movie is a bit sad, then legendary and of course heart-warming. Personally, I will never forgive the McCallisters for what they put that child through. He's better than me because I'd make good on that promise once I got old enough. (...jk 👀 )

The Holiday

Columbia Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection

You might say this one is corny, and I'm here to tell you that you're simply wrong. Amanda (Cameron Diaz) is this movie trailer producer in Los Angeles and she goes through a break up with her boyfriend who cheated on her. Iris (Kate Winslet) is a writer at a well-known British publication who's in love with her ex/colleague Jasper. Jasper gets engaged and she has to cover the story! So naturally these two are spiraling and decide they need to leave their respective continents. They come across each other's listings on a home swap site and they make it happen. Fast forward, Amanda meets Iris' hot brother (Jude Law) when he threatens to piss on the front porch of her temporary home. Iris meets Miles (Jack Black) and also makes friends with a sweet old man that lives in the neighborhood. In the end, Amanda learns that she indeed can cry, and Iris and Miles both learn self-respect. All's well that ends well.

Four Christmases

Everett Collection

Brad (Vince Vaughn) and Kate (Reese Witherspoon) both come from divorced and dysfunctional families. They avoid them especially around the holidays, but are forced to spend time visiting all four families in one day after their flight to Fiji, where they were meant to spend Christmas gets canceled. The couple is not married and kid-free and are seemingly happy about it until they start learning things they didn't know about each other from spending time with their families. Someone figures out they actually want more of a commitment while the other is scared of it --- surprise, surprise. This movie is also just hilarious. I watch it with my family when it's on and we always have a great time. I literally die at the scene when Kate/Reese is handed a baby and she swings her around and accidentally shuts a cabinet with her head. 😭 You have to watch to see what I'm talking about.

Holiday in Handcuffs

ABC Family

I'm jealous of you if you haven't seen this movie because you're in for a treat. Aspiring painter Trudie (Melissa Joan Heart) is working as a waitress, she misses a job interview and her boyfriend breaks up with her all right before Christmas when she is meant to see her seemingly perfect family. Naturally, she has a mental breakdown from the stress of going home for the holidays and kidnaps David (Mario Lopez), a random customer at the restaurant and introduces him to her family as Nick (her ex-boyfriend). Trudie's family is vacationing at an isolated log cabin, so David is unable to escape. He starts to play along and ultimately presses charges and throws her ass in jail when he's freed. Just joking! He falls for her, duh!

Christmas Cupid

ABC Family

ABC Family holiday movies used to be *chef's kiss*. This banger starts with Ashley Benson (who's an actress/party girl) chocking on an olive from her martini and dying. 😂 She then comes back a the ghosts of Christmas past, present and future to lead her PR agent (Christina Milian) on a trip through her past relationships, to make her realize who her one true love was all along.

Love Actually

Universal/Courtesy Everett Collection

Ugh, this move is gold. If you know, you know and if you haven't watched it, don't write it off as just another romantic comedy. This movie has some of the most heart-wrenching scenes. You might actually cry if it catches you on a good day. It tells nine intertwined stories about love. "Among the characters explored are David (Hugh Grant), the handsome newly elected British prime minister who falls for a young junior staffer (Martine McCutcheon), Sarah (Laura Linney), a graphic designer whose devotion to her mentally ill brother complicates her love life, and Harry (Alan Rickman), a married man tempted by his attractive new secretary." (Google)

Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas

Universal/Courtesy Everett Collection

"In this live-action adaptation of the beloved children's tale by Dr. Seuss, the reclusive green Grinch (Jim Carrey) decides to ruin Christmas for the cheery citizens of Whoville. Reluctantly joined by his hapless dog, Max, the Grinch comes down from his mountaintop home and sneaks into town to swipe everything holiday-related from the Whos. However, the bitter grump finds a hitch in his plans when he encounters the endearing Cindy Lou Who (Taylor Momsen)." (Google). Another classic. Jim Carey was iconic in this, and those kids that grew up to be the townspeople were assholes then and also as adults. He was very much in his right to act the way he did. 😂 But I'm glad everyone experienced growth and that his heart grew three sizes.

A Charlie Brown Christmas

Courtesy Everett Collection

"In the special, Charlie Brown finds himself depressed despite the onset of the cheerful holiday season. After Lucy suggests he direct a neighborhood Christmas play, his best efforts are ignored and mocked by his peers when he chooses a puny Christmas tree as a centerpiece." (Wikipedia) It's very cute and only 25 minutes.

Unaccompanied Minors

Warner Bros

"When a Christmas Eve blizzard shuts down the airport, five stranded youths take the opportunity to run wild and have some fun. Racing with golf carts and sliding down baggage chutes, the kids create holiday pandemonium for an uptight airport official (Lewis Black) and his gullible assistant (Wilmer Valderrama)." (Google) Too many funny scenes to list but the way that little psycho girl at the lodge braids the little sister's hair kills me! 😭

Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer

Warner Bros

Buckle tf up! This one's a trip. Grandma gets hit by Santa's reindeer (obviously). He takes her back up to the North Pole and the woman has amnesia. She's missing for a year! All because cousin Mel is a bird and is trying to sell her store. She even goes as far as to get Santa arrested and tries to sue him to get her way! Santa was on trial and she's singing, "Grandpa's gonna sue the pants off of Santa cause that's what grandma would've wanted him to." 😭😭

Frosty the Snowman

Classic Media/Studio B Prouctions

"The mayor of Evergreen dismisses magic as nonsense, but when Frosty the Snowman blows through town, he shows the local children that magic is real." (Google) This mayor is super type A and expects his family and all the families in the town to be perfect. Then the magical snowman pulls up and teaches the kids to get loose a bit. The parents also learn in the process.

SpongeBob Christmas Episodes

Nickelodeon Animation Studios

Specifically Christmas Who? (season 2, episode 8). "Nobody in Bikini Bottom has ever heard of Christmas or Santa Clause until Sandy lets them in on this surface tradition. SpongeBob wants to bring Christmas to Bikini Bottom this year and his enthusiasm is infectious. Everyone gets into the spirit, waiting for Santa to arrive on the big day. Everyone except Squidward, who has scoffed at SpongeBob the whole while. When Santa is a no show on Christmas morning, everyone blames SpongeBob for getting their hopes up. But in a surprise ending, Squidward uncharacteristically saves the day and Christmas ends up coming after all." (IMDB)

Happiest Season

Hulu

"A young woman (Kristen Stewart) with a plan to propose to her girlfriend while at her family's annual holiday party discovers her partner hasn't yet come out to her conservative parents." Again, you might cry.

Holidate

Netflix

"Fed up with being single on holidays, two strangers agree to be each other's platonic plus-ones all year long, only to catch real feelings along the way." (Google)

How to Ruin Christmas

Netflix

This is a bougie, South African comedy and there are three seasons to binge. In season one, "Tumi tries to make things right after ruining what should have been her sister's picture-perfect Christmas wedding." (Google)

Just Friends

New Line Cinema

"High school student Chris Brander (Ryan Reynolds) loves his best friend, Jamie Palamino (Amy Smart). He finally confesses his feelings, but she tells him that she just wants to be friends, and he leaves town in shame. Ten years later, Chris is a successful record executive and involved with self-absorbed pop star Samantha James (Anna Faris). He still pines for Jamie, though, and when his plans to go to Paris for the holidays fall through, he returns to his hometown to try and win her heart." Dysfunctional and hilarious.